Aspiring to be better and pretending in the meantime.
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The lady in question was far superior on the eye compared to any lady you may have previously encountered. Certainly nothing even remotely related to the local promiscuous sort.

I am attempting to purchase the lexis to grant sufficient descriptive quality without causing undue offence,

What with the way said ma’am moves her derrière I find it hard to control my emotions.

I must prostrate myself to cease my activities to approach the lady somewhat closer so as to grant greater chance of engagement.

Once again I find myself devoid of the vocabulary to illustrate what it is I am witnessing without causing an outcry,

But, DAMN YOU’S A SEXY BITCH!!!

HA!

HA!

Introducing: ME

(via cathodenarcissus)

For Hamish, and an advert for my other blog that has taken off in the short time it has been running

http://keepcalmposters2.tumblr.com

They say the camera adds 10 pounds…

Well stop eating fucking cameras!

Jimmy Carr